Are you annoyed by fellow-Christians being all up in your business? Would you like to just live life the way you want without having to deal with that nasty feeling you get when you are around those super-holy Christians? Tired of feeling judged?
If so, I’ve got great news for you. By using the Bible…yes that Bible…you can defend yourself against the onslaught of Christian conviction. Nobody likes to feel bad about themselves—and now you don’t have to.
There are three truths in the Bible that if applied appropriately will protect you from those nosy Christians always trying to make you somebody you are not.
Truth #1: Be You
Read Psalm 139:14.
This means that God created you as a unique individual. It’s also solid biblical theology to say that you cannot relate to God as someone else. You must relate to God as you really are. So be who He created you to be and don’t try to be someone else. Authentically relate to the Lord and to others.j
Most of those invasive Christians will agree with all of that—as they should, it’s biblical. But don’t stop there. Really drive this point home. Use that truth to say something like this:
I’m just going to be me. I don’t care what other people think of me. If they have a problem with me or my behavior or my choices then that is on them. I live my life and you live yours.
It’ll take more than this to quiet those aggressive Christians who hide behind the sham of “caring for you”. What you really need at this stage is to believe this truth yourself. You need to convince yourself that God is satisfied with you just exactly as you are. And he doesn’t want you to change one bit.
Truth #2: Avoid Toxic People
Scripture tells us to set our minds on positive things. Likewise we are told to avoid certain types of people—among them those who are divisive and only seek to bring us down.
It is good biblical counsel to surround yourself with people who encourage your faith. And there are times when you need to distance yourself from toxic people.
And who is more toxic than a fellow Christian who is making you feel bad about yourself? You need to tell them and yourself something like this:
If you aren’t for me then I don’t need you. If you don’t approve of me and the choices I make then I don’t need you in my life. I’ve got to surround myself with positive people who are going to encourage me.
Shut those contrary voices out of your life. Remind yourself daily that a toxic person is one who leads you away from your “authentic self” (see #1).
Truth #3: Judge Not
Read Matthew 7:1-5
It is biblical truth that we should be more concerned with what we see in the mirror than what we see in someone else’s mirror. I should worry about my own relationship with God before I start picking at someone else’s life.
All you have to do is remind those prying Christians of this verse. Point them to Matthew 7and point out the log in their eye. They’ve likely got stuff in their own life they are dealing with—after all we are all sinners. Remind them of this and point out that since they aren’t Jesus they don’t have any right to ever judge you.
If you wholeheartedly believe these three truths and apply them in the way prescribed above you will erect an almost impenetrable force field for any believer to speak into your life. No more intrusive fellowship. No more inquisition. It’s just you and Jesus living the way you want to live.
And it all comes at the low introductory price* of shutting yourself off from those toxic people that didn’t like you for you anyways.
*Legal disclaimer: After the low introductory price you will be charged monthly fees at a much higher rate. Having shut yourself off from these “toxic” people you’ll also be cutting ties with actual change and meaningful Christian fellowship.
Also, for legal purposes, I must mention that studies have found that these “bad feelings” are only shut out for a season. After time it will stop working. You can go back through these three steps but eventually they too will wear thin. You’ll have to engage in even more extreme measures to shut out Christian conviction—eventually even denying the One who bought you.
But, hey, it’s worth it! Nobody wants to feel bad about themselves.