Don’t Fritter Life with Twitter Strife!

Different strokes for different folks,
And so on and so on and Scooby dooby doo-bee.
(Everyday People by Sly and the Family Stone, 1968)

I get it. You are more than capable of making your own decisions concerning social media. Because I am profoundly committed to the idea that you possess free will, you do whatever you want. As for me, my aversion to Twitter has developed into full blown bitter contempt—a loathing born not from its requirement for brevity, which I admire, but from its mode of expression demanding abruptness, inspiring haste and facilitating the clandestine spread of gossip at the touch of a button.

Top Ten Truths Trumpeting Twitter Termination: 

1. Life is short. Fifteen minutes of Twitter a day adds up to over ninety hours per year! There is simply more to life than typing on your cell phone.

2. Nuance is nonexistent. Missing is the subordinate clause, with all of its subtlety inducing beauty, patiently creating interest and establishing tone.

3. Speech requires thought. Shorter messages truncate thinking, reduce idea marination, and rush cooking time—making food for thought tough to digest.

4. Composition is distracting. Exchanges occupy life’s gaps—in line, prior to a meeting or while eating lunch. When it’s time to leave, tweets get rushed.

5. Bluntness is rude. The 140 character format promotes a directness so often mistaken for sheer cruelty that “Twitter War” has entered our vocabulary.

6. Stalking is evil. You don’t call, write, text or post—you follow. From a distance. Knowing their every move. This sounds like the language of stalking.

7. Being followed is scary. Suppose a stranger follows you down a city street. Uncertain of his intentions, you feel vulnerable and exposed. Because you are.

8. Falsehood is rewarded. Lenient registration terms invite Fake Identities—masks behind which cowards may sling mud immune from any consequences.

9. Why repeat gossip? Retweet it instead, using the most efficient gossip delivery system in world history. Press the button. Your followers and theirs will too.

10. Other options exist. Why share frequently blunt and hastily written notes prone to spread like wildfire with unidentified and possibly hostile followers?

Tolkien wrote, “All that is gold does not glitter. Not all those who wander are lost. ” But I say, “All are not sold on this Twitter. For too few are counting the cost.”

N.C. senator studied ethics at SEBTS

Chad Barefoot, a recent graduate of Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary with a degree in Christian ethics, is serving his first term in the North Carolina Senate as its youngest member.